DEVELOPING ONE’S PERSONALITY
Positive Thinking
No! Their own deeds have cast a veil over their hearts. (THE QURAN 83: 14)
THIS verse refers to those who deny the revelation of the Quran indicating a psychological issue concerning those people who are stubborn and heedless. This issue is described in a Hadith as follows: “When a person commits a wrong deed a black spot appears on his heart. If he abandons the wrong deed, seeks forgiveness and repents, then the black spot will be erased from his heart. But If he returns to the wrong deed, the blackness increases until it covers his entire heart.” (Ibn Majah)
This Hadith relates a psychological fact in symbolic language.
Whenever a person does something wrong but then quickly becomes conscious of what he has done and develops the desire in his heart not to engage in the bad deed again, his heart becomes pure. But if he keeps committing one bad deed after another and does not introspect and neutralize their influence on his heart, then, gradually, his heart becomes insensitive. He begins to live in evil, and truth will have no influence on him.
Today, most people are drowned in negative thinking. Even if someone seems to be talking positive things, it is almost always only at a very superficial level.
Modern psychological research has shown that there are three major parts of the human mind. They are part of the human mind since birth.
These three parts are: 1. The conscious mind
2. The subconscious mind
3. The unconscious mind
Experience and research tell us that once a thought enters our mind, it becomes a part of the mind forever. As is known, our mind is actually another name for our personality. This means that once a thought enters our mind, it becomes a part of our personality, so much that if we try to separate it from our personality we cannot do so. Modern psychological research has further clarified this. It is no longer a mysterious belief and has now become a known fact. It has become understandable for us at the intellectual level too.
When a thought, whether positive or negative, enters our mind, it, first of all, becomes part of our conscious mind. This is also called our conscious memory. After this, when we go to sleep at night, following a natural process, the thought travels by itself from the conscious mind and enters the subconscious mind. When this happens, we have only 50% conscious control remaining over that thought. 50% is now beyond our conscious control. After this, the next night that we sleep, the thought travels further and enters our unconscious mind. When this happens, the thought gets completely out of our conscious control and becomes the source of moulding our personality according to this thought.
It is the everyday thoughts that enter our minds first into the conscious, then to the subconscious and lastly get stored into the unconscious that build our personality continuously. Therefore as our thoughts are, so is our personality. Positive thoughts create a positive personality. Negative thoughts create a negative personality
Today, most people are drowned in negative thinking. Even if someone seems to be talking positive things, it is almost always only at a very superficial level. If you discuss with this person in greater detail and seek to know the inside of his mind, you will find that his inner personality is as negative as anyone else’s. In this way, today every single person lives in negativity, without even being aware of it. And in this aspect there seems to be perhaps no difference between religious and secular people.
Experience and research tell us that once a thought enters our mind, it becomes a part of the mind forever.
It is a fact that the worst sort of personality is a negative personality and that the best personality is a positive personality. Given this, the question is: How can we build a positive personality?
If you reflect on the issue in the light of both Islamic teachings and findings of psychology, you will find a clear practical way to do so.
By following the practical method discussed in the next few lines one could overcome this problem. Whenever a negative thought enters one’s mind, at the very first instance one should try to resolve it by converting it into a positive aspect. For example, if you are angry with someone, forgive him at once so that your anger does not assume the form of revenge. Or, if you are unhappy at someone’s progress, look at it as a good news that, hard work will bring in good results and feel motivated to work more for your own progress. This way you will prevent a feeling of jealousy which is a very harmful trait.
You should practice this method with every negative thought that enters your conscious mind, and make use of the consciousness completely to convert it to your advantage. If you delay in doing this, the thought will travel into your subconscious mind, and then, after some time, enter your unconscious mind. And when it enters your unconscious mind, it will become such an integral part of your personality that no matter how much you may try to separate it from yourself, you will not succeed.
Whenever a negative thought enters one's mind, at the very first instance one should try to resolve it by converting it into a positive aspect.
Generally people do not practice this. And they pay a terrible price for it—this being the negative personality behind every seemingly beautifully attired person.
If you want to save yourself from this terrible end, you must adopt the method outlined above and make it an integral part of your daily life. Other than this, there is no method to solve this issue.
Tolerance means, to give consideration to
others. A pious man should be a man of
principle as far as he himself is concerned, but
should be tolerant towards others. He should
judge himself in the light of the ideal but in
the matter of his fellow men he should show
tolerance and broad-mindedness—this being
inseparable from human gentility and nobility.
Islam aims to produce this fine human quality
of gentlemanliness by preaching tolerance.